Now, my dear people, I’ve taught you this to help you understand your duty to God, to help you be blameless before Him, so you will let the Holy Order of God lead you, which is why God received you. Now I want you to be humble, submissive, gentle, easy to persuade, full of patience and long-suffering, being self-controlled in all things, faithfully keeping God’s commandments, asking for whatever you might need, both spiritual and temporal, always giving thanks to God for whatever you receive. Make sure you have faith, hope, and charity, and then you will always be eager to do many good works.
—Alma 5:6 CC
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
I’ve had a variety of responses to the first three posts in this series—both public and private—which have resulted in delightful discussions and some awkward exchanges. As a result of these interactions, I feel the need to clarify an important definition, which if misunderstood, leads to all sorts of problems. So in the hope of promoting better understanding, I’ll start by stating it as simply as possible:
Disputation is a behavior.
This is a fundamental and important notion that must be firmly grasped if we are to ever obey the Lord’s command and come to mutual agreement. Disputation is not mere disagreement, and it is not a matter of mere thought. It is a behavior, intentionally engaged in, and is against the Lord’s will.
Disputation is Not Disagreement
For purposes of this discussion, I’ll classify disagreement as a matter of ideas; it is primarily confined to the realm of thought. Of course, disagreement can and should be expressed. A free exchange of ideas is crucial among any people seeking to be the Lord’s; all should have opportunity to express their ideas, even when they contradict the ideas of others. We need not fear ideas, nor the open discussion of them. Ideas can be discussed kindly, openly, lovingly, and ultimately even productively.
But above all, the Lord has stipulated that such disagreement can and should be conducted respectfully; in fact He has gone so far as to require us to learn how to disagree! Imagine that! Our Lord, who prizes our agency, which is the root of our individuality, expects us to disagree with one another—indeed to do so on a regular basis! He insists that we learn how to do this thing! And do it in a certain way:
For you to unite I must admonish and instruct you, for my will is to have you love one another. As people, you lack the ability to respectfully disagree among one another.
—T&C 157:3
Discussion of disagreements may result in one or the other party being persuaded. When both have access to the same light and truth, they tend toward unity of thought. Agreement and disagreement, therefore, are a function of information and understanding. But when disagreement leads to disputation and contention, a line has been crossed where our Lord will not go. To help shed some light on these definitions, let’s look in the Glossary of Gospel Terms. the entry for “Disputation” begins with this statement:
The Lord’s elaboration on “disputations” and “contentions” in 3 Nephi 5:8–9 is important and consistent enough that it should all be considered together.
What follows is an elaboration on the inappropriateness of disputing about ordinances. Lest we should too narrowly consider this advice, we would do well to remember that anything ordained by the Lord is an ordinance. This includes the Statement of Principles assignment, which the Lord ordained that his people should accomplish together, without disputation. In fact, His requirement of Mutual Agreement, together with the definition He gave of this term, prevent Him from accepting anything that involves disputation.
The discussion culminates in the following way (emphasis added):
On the other hand, Christ is saying to keep the ordinances unchanged. And further, don’t even begin to dispute them. They are off limits for argument, dispute, and discussion. “When you open the opportunity to dispute over the ordinances, you are allowing the devil an opportunity to influence the discussion and change the ordinances. Disputes lead to contention, contention leads to anger, and anger is the devil’s tool. So don’t start down that road. Accept and understand the ordinances. If you are perplexed by them, then let those who understand speak, exhort, expound, and teach concerning them. As they do, you will come into the unity of faith and become one. Perplexity cannot exist when there is light and truth. Light and truth comes from understanding the ordinances, not changing them. So do not begin the process through dispute. The purpose of discussion is not to dispute, which leads to contention, which leads to anger. When the Gospel and its ordinances turn into something angry and contentious, then the spirit has fled, and souls are lost. It is the devil’s objective to prevent you from practicing the ordinances in the correct manner. But, more importantly, it is his objective to prevent you from becoming one. When he uses arguments over ordinances to cause disunity, he is playing with two tools at the same time. First, changing the ordinances brings about cursings, and second, encouraging contention and anger grieves the spirit, and prevents the saints from becoming one. The devil knows this, even if men do not. Men are urged to take steps they presume have little effect, all the while being lied to by the enemy of their souls. When men arrive at the point they are angry in their hearts with one another, they are not united by love as they are intended to be. These are the end results of the two paths. One leading to love and joy (Helaman 2:25), and the other to anger and wrath (T&C 69:7).” See also CONTENTION.
Since the entry recommends we also look at the entry for Contention, let’s take a look at that as well (emphasis added):
The more one contends with others the more he is taken captive by the spirit of contention. Everyone becomes subject to the spirit they submit to follow. Those who are prone to contention become more contentious as they listen to that spirit. Eventually they are overcome by that spirit, and it is a great work involving great effort to subdue and dismiss that spirit from the heart and mind of the victim. There are many who dispute the inspiration others have received. There are two concerns with the decision a good person makes to dispute with others: First, the Lord’s example is to refrain from disputing, as He did. When confronted, He would respond, but He did not go about picking a fight with others. He responded. The only exception was when He went up to Jerusalem to be slain. Then He went into the seat of Jewish power and authority to throw it down and provoke their decision to finally judge, reject, and crucify Him. He, and not they, controlled that timing. His provocation at that time was a deliberate act on His part because His “time had come,” and His sacrifice needed to be made. Second, the Lord has given the Doctrine of Christ in scripture. Just before the Doctrine of Christ, He says what His doctrine is not: Neither shall there be disputations among you concerning the points of my doctrine, as there hath hitherto been. For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the Devil, who is the father of contention; and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another. Behold, this is not my doctrine, to stir up the hearts of men with anger, one against another, but this is my doctrine, that such things should be done away (3 Nephi 5:8). And then He proceeds to declare His doctrine of Christ. The more contention and disputation there is with one another, the better the people become at contention. Rhetorical skills are polished. That spirit of contention can take possession, and when it does, one is hard-pressed to be a peacemaker with others.
The Contention entry goes on and recommends also consulting the entry for Mutual Agreement, which is as follows (emphasis added):
In response to prayers and pleadings, the Lord answered with a definition of mutual agreement (as used in the Answer to Prayer for Covenant) this way: “As between one another, you choose to not dispute” (T&C 174:1). Simply put, even if men or women disagree, if they choose to not dispute, they have mutual agreement. “Pray together in humility and together meekly present your dispute to me, and if you are contrite before me, I will tell you my part (T&C 157:54).” When the definition was given, it was accompanied by the realization the Lord could have disputed every day of His life with someone. He deliberately chose to not contend. He was not an argumentative personality. “As between one another (that is, every one of us because every one of us is involved in a relationship with one another) you choose [to not dispute]. Mind you, Christ could have disputed, he could have corrected, he could have challenged every one of the ongoing religious and social conventions of his day…. How much of the gospel of Christ would not have been possible for Him to preach if He’d gone about contending? He chose not to. In that respect, perhaps His most godly example was the patience with which He dealt with those around him — kindly, patiently, correcting them when they largely came to Him with questions trying to trap Him, but affirmatively stating in the Sermon on the Mount how you could take any group of people and turn them into Zion itself, if we would live the Sermon on the Mount.”
I Will Tell You My Part
In T&C 157:54 we find the following (quoted in part above):
Study to learn how to respect your brothers and sisters and to come together by precept, reason, and persuasion, rather than sharply disputing and wrongly condemning each other, causing anger. Take care how you invoke my name. Mankind has been controlled by the adversary through anger and jealousy, which has led to bloodshed and the misery of many souls. Even strong disagreements should not provoke anger, nor to invoke my name in vain as if I had part in your every dispute. Pray together in humility and together meekly present your dispute to me, and if you are contrite before me, I will tell you my part.
This particular invitation has caused quite a bit of mischief, and I believe is not what it seems. Allow me to explain:
First, the Lord admonishes us to come together and to do so by the peaceful means of precept, reason and persuasion, echoing the prior teaching about disagreeing respectfully. The Lord then prohibits sharply disputing and wrongly condemning each other, causing anger. We need not even question why he commands such. By now we’ve been over it a number of times and know that He chooses to not dispute and expects us to choose likewise.
Then He cautions us to take care how we invoke his name, together with a caution about anger, “as if” He says “I had part in your every dispute.” Clearly, the Lord does NOT have part in our every dispute, and in fact has consistently counseled that disputes should be avoided altogether.
He then offers this command: “Pray together in humility and together meekly present your dispute to me, and if you are contrite before me, I will tell you my part.”
Let’s suppose, just for a moment, that the Lord was serious about this command, and He really expects people who are sharply disputing and wrongly condemning one another in anger to “pray together in humility” and “meekly present [their] dispute” with the promise that He will “tell [them] His part” if they are contrite.
First, what do you think the effect of praying together in humility will be on the angry, arguing, condemning parties? Is it possible to remain angry, jealous, and stubborn while also praying together in real humility?
Second, the Lord expects contrition. Why should they be contrite?
Well first and foremost because they have sinned.
What? Sinned how?
The Lord makes it abundantly clear that disputation, particularly about His Gospel, is against His will, and therefore sinful. It appears the act of approaching the Lord in meekness with contrition is in acknowledgment of the sin in which the disputing parties have been engaged.
Now, with the foundation of humility, meekness, and contrition laid, the Lord has promised to tell His part. What do you suppose the Lord’s part in a dispute is? To pick sides? To say who was right and vindicated (yay!) and who was wrong and condemned (boo!)? Is that His part? As if He had part in our every dispute? Do we expect he is going to pick sides?
No, I think not. I dare not speak for the Lord in this matter, but I suspect that in any dispute in which the parties have humbled themselves, come in meekness, and displayed contrition for their sin, the Lord’s part is to forgive and to teach. As he said earlier in the same revelation:
I speak these words to reprove you that you may learn, not to upbraid you so that you mourn. I want my people to have understanding.
—T&C 157:5
Repent and Forgive
Anyone who has been involved in disputations within the covenant body is therefore invited to repent, myself included. This involves acknowledgement, humility, meekness and contrition. But it must start with the realization that contention and disputation are sinful—not merely to be avoided, but also to be the object of repentance.
So this leads us back to the beginning of this post: Disputation is a behavior. In fact, it’s a sinful behavior—that not only mars those engaging it, but also damages the entire covenant body to the point that the Lord cannot work with us as a people. He gave us an assignment over seven years ago that still lacks completion, and the path to completion is repentance.
If we cannot repent, we cannot advance.
Repentance is personal. Nobody can repent on behalf of someone else, nor can we engage in organized, institutional repentance. The closest we can come is to acknowledge the harm of our behavior to those we have harmed and ask forgiveness. Likewise, having realized our sin, both collective and individual, we must forgive one another so we can be of one heart.
“Be one,” the Lord says, “and if you are not one, you are not mine.” (T&C 22:7)
The path forward is clear. It is simple. It is crucial. And it beckons.
For myself, I acknowledge that I have engaged in disputation and contention, and I intend to avoid such behavior in the future. If I have given offense to anyone reading this, please reach out and let me know so I can repent more fully.
When the Lord Disputed
In all things, our Lord is our example. As is noted in the glossary entry on Contention:
…the Lord’s example is to refrain from disputing, as He did. When confronted, He would respond, but He did not go about picking a fight with others. He responded. The only exception was when He went up to Jerusalem to be slain. Then He went into the seat of Jewish power and authority to throw it down and provoke their decision to finally judge, reject, and crucify Him.
From this we learn the only time the Lord chose to dispute, it resulted in His death. And it will surely result in ours as well.
Let us choose a better path.
The Path of the Peacemaker
In His sermon, our Lord pronounced a blessing upon the peacemakers (Matt 3:12 RE). As we read in the glossary entry under “Peacemaker”:
More often than not, those who are “peacemakers” will be abused. They will have to endure aggression and give a soft word in return (see Proverbs 2:152). There will be no end to the peace which comes from Christ because there was no end to the suffering He was willing to endure (see Isaiah 4:1). When mankind hearkens to the Lord’s commandments, they have peace like a flowing river (see Isaiah 17:3). This is because the Lord will fight for them, and they can hold their peace. The Lord will fight Zion’s battles.
We have the opportunity before us to be gathered into a city of peace. But such a gathering cannot take place until there is a people of peace to be gathered. Peacemakers are those who choose to not dispute, and refuse to engage in such behavior. They turn the other cheek. (Matt 3:25 RE) They find blessing in being persecuted for His name’s sake. (Acts 3:9 RE; Matt 3:14 RE) They make peace.
Covenant Christians
And now this discussion comes full circle back to the beginning of this series. The Lord has put his name upon us and claimed us as His own. Though His offer is real, it is not yet fully realized. Nevertheless, it is based upon His faith and hope that we will respond to his teachings, learn by precept, and truly become His in very deed by overcoming our disputations and contentions, and becoming true peacemakers.
This is His path and the way in which we become His.
“Blessed are all the peacemakers,” said He, “for they shall be called the children of God.” (Matt 3:12 RE). God is indeed with them. (3 Nephi 5:9 CC)
He offers us everything! And all he asks is that we lay down our burdens of disputation and tread upon them like stones under our feet on a path to His house. If we desire to become His children, we will demonstrate it by responding to His generous offer. We will repent.
I descended below it all, and know the sorrows of you all, and have borne the grief of it all, and I say to you, Forgive one another. Be tender with one another, pursue judgment, bless the oppressed, care for the orphan, and uplift the widow in her need, for I have redeemed you from being orphaned and taken you that you are no longer a widowed people. Rejoice in me, and rejoice with your brethren and sisters who are mine also. Be one.
—T&C 157:50
